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Fatumas Voice Latest Questions

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Robert Mũnũku
Chui

What is your take on ‘baby-shaming’ and ‘marriage-shaming’?

Sometime back I was sitting with some friends and began talking about a celebrity athlete who has been living a flashy lifestyle. One of my friends asked, “He seems to have all the money, but does he even have children?” What later emerged is that indeed he does have but the point here was that he would have been thought of as lesser if he did not.

Young women in Nairobi are always asked when they are getting married and get undue pressure to do so. Men too are now asked why they do not have ‘someone’ or when they will bring grandchildren home. Again, undue pressure. This prompts many (who are not even cut-out for marriage or have the right person) to rush to get married to quench social expectations. But can one contribute to society only through the conventional marriage/family model?

I tend to think otherwise. Do not get me wrong children are great but children are not for everyone and so is marriage life. In the same way, not everyone can be a filmmaker or artist like me or a cook or architect like another person. I tend to believe I have helped more people through my work with my company than I would have if I was married – again, this is not a universal truth, it simply applies to me, for someone else it may be different.

I say, let us learn to respect one another. You are not superior/lesser because you are married/unmarried, have children or do not. What makes you YOU is your character and how you choose to live your life.

Let’s stop age-shaming, baby-shaming & marriage-shaming, in fact, lets stop prejudice.

Happy Boxing Day!

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1 Answer

  1. Hate drives most of the shaming that happens online. Cyber bullying comes from people who may not even know you or have never met you. It is okay to not like something for yourself but projecting that dislike to other people who don't share the same ideals is just a disgusting low. Most of the shameRead more

    Hate drives most of the shaming that happens online. Cyber bullying comes from people who may not even know you or have never met you. It is okay to not like something for yourself but projecting that dislike to other people who don’t share the same ideals is just a disgusting low. Most of the shamers would never say it to your face and only speak when they are behind a computer as an escape to their lives or a bad reality they dont want ti deal with. It is so sad that our laws are not strict enough to nab them and when they do the punishment is not intense enough to discourage others.

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