Listen. Speak. Unlearn. Discover.
Listen. Speak. Unlearn. Discover.
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Why are most parents mean to their children in the name of tough love? Do they realize that different children can interpret this differently and some can end up feeling unloved and fall into depression? Is this method effective and has it worked for you? If you have children, what kind of parenting are you practicing?
some parents practice tough love because they believe that being tough will instill discipline in the child, teaching the child how to obey authorities, and preventing them from making mistakes in the future.
Tough love instills fear in children. Once fear is introduced in a relationship, it is easier to control the weaker party. It is not only in African homes that fear is instilled, look at the Bible, apparently if you don’t abide the whole wrath of God as described in Revelation, will befall you.
So to answer your question if it works, yes it does. I am so sure I went to school and put on a sweater not because I liked it, because I feared what my parents would do to me.
Do I think it is right? To some point, yes. Sometimes it is very difficult to seat down with a child and explain the situation with them, so I think dictating your way, as a parent on raising them will work. However, I think parents should learn to apologize and explain their actions. Maybe that way, a child will feel more loved and considered.
GIGO
Most of our parents grew up in colonial times and did not have the privileges we have right now. We will probably be the kind of parents who spoil their children. The issue about love and how we feel is not fully dependent of parents. I know people who have low self esteem and yet had the best parenthood, white there are people who had the worst upbringing and yet have the best of hearts.
That’s the way they were brought up abs that’s what works for them. They grew up watching colonialists walk over this land while then stayed silent. They grew up knowing any opposition from them will be faced with force and violence. They were doing the best they know. We however, can not do this because we know better an have been exposed to suitable alternatives.